Clifford J. Shoemaker and Lisa Sykes: Putrid Lawyering

Before today, I hadn't written any blog posts that mentioned, even in passing, Shoemaker or Sykes or their dubious doings in the arena of vaccine litigation and autism profiteering. Nonetheless, it looks as if they've decided that I am part of the vast conspiracy whereby Big Pharma, the government, the Illuminati, little green space aliens with tentacles, etc., cruelly inflicted upon society a tsunami of little children who might otherwise have died from vaccine-preventable diseases, or something of the sort.

Kathleen Seidel reported yesterday that Shoemaker issued a subpoena to her in the case of Sykes v. Bayer—as to which she has no connection whatsoever, beyond her investigative reporting—demanding that she hand over all her correspondence with more than a hundred bloggers, including yours truly. Gee, I suppose we ought to feel flattered that our posts about diversity and civil rights are striking such terror into the craven little hearts of the snake oil brigade. The next thing you know, they'll be wanting us to appear personally in court to prove that we don't have green tentacles. (Note to self: after returning from secret meeting aboard flying saucer, inspect blog sidebar picture carefully to make sure all tentacles have been completely edited out.)

Not satisfied to stop there, his slime-o-matic subpoena also demands Kathleen's bank statements, tax returns, and "communication with any religious groups (Muslim or otherwise), or individuals with religious affiliations…"

Charming little bit of innuendo, wouldn't you say? I guess it's meant to suggest that the Evil Neurodiverse (tm) are now part of a Muslim-pharma-Illuminati-government-extraterrestrial conspiracy. Just call me ABFH Hussein.

Oh, and if you order right now, you'll also get Shoemaker's amazing miracle cleaver, which slices and dices the truth, shreds any semblance of dignity and decency, chops logic six ways from Sunday, and minces the duty of an officer of the court. Free tinfoil beanies to the first 100 customers!

I expect the judge finds this garbage a lot less amusing than I do. I also expect, though, that when Shoemaker gets his conniving ass sanctioned for conduct unbecoming a bottom-feeder, he'll just whine that the judge must be part of the conspiracy too.

Update, April 21: Kathleen's motion to quash the subpoena has been granted, and Shoemaker has been ordered to show cause why he should not be sanctioned.

Update, May 18: Shoemaker's tinfoil beanie tantrum gets even more clownishly ridiculous in the response to the order to show cause.

Update, June 24: Shoemaker has been sanctioned for his "unwarranted and unseemly" conduct in issuing the subpoena.