Good Ol' Boys
'Course, we know they ain't never gonna be normal, however much we beat tar outta 'em. See, they ain't really human like us. But we just like to whup on 'em anyway, 'cause it's fun, and maybe if we do it enough we'll finally beat some sense into their thick ree-tard skulls and run 'em outta town.
Just now heard tell there's some agitatin' in Congress about seclusion and restraint in the schools. Seems we got us some damn fools who think it's cruel to lock ree-tards in broom closets or duct tape 'em to chairs. They even set up a National Call-In Day to do more agitatin' about it. Hoo-ee, ain't they ever gonna stop yappin' about civil rights and interferin' with the way regular folks do things? It was bad enough when we had to let the Nee-groes into our schools, and of course they started gettin' too friendly with our daughters, and now we got us a moo-latto in the White House. Country's goin' to hell in a handbasket, I tell you. Ain't no wonder we got troublemakers as want to be nice to ree-tards.
Don't let 'em fool you with all their agitatin' about civil rights. You know, that's just a code word for the Satan-worshiping commie Illuminati conspiracy to set up a world government, take away all our guns, and burn all our Bibles. Well, I got plenty guns in the cellar, and even a Bible down there somewhere under all the ammo, and anyone fool enough to come for my guns is gonna be pure-dee daid. Got me a rope for any ree-tard what tries to get too friendly with my daughter, too, and a big ol' tree picked out to hang him from.
Now, if any good normal folks want to find me before the Klan meetin' tonight, I'll be out on the lake fishin' with a bottle of Jim Beam…